My Jessie Journal: Hi Sweet-pea. Dang I miss you so much. I love this pic of us from our 1st charity golf tournament. It was so great having you with us. I still can’t believe it will be 40+ years until I hold you again. I know that is nothing in God’s time table but it sure seems like a long long long long time.
Thankfully you left me a task to fill my time=)…”Daddy, please make sure every kid is told to NEGU and gets one of my JoyJars.” I think about when you told me and the look in your eyes…such conviction. You cared so much for the other kids. You compassion for other kids drives me everyday to make an impact in your name.
I shared all about you to over 400 people at your gala last Saturday. It was such an amazing event Jess. I’m confident you were smiling down…especially when dessert came=). Your spirit was in the room and when we got to tell Cade, Ayden and Rhys to NEVER EVER GIVE UP i just knew you were shouting it to. I also got the chance to tell people that your JoyJars are not the end but the start of a relationship with a child/family fighting cancer. Someone thought “all we do is send JoyJars”…silly man. I think he understands now the impact you made and are still making through your foundation. A foundation that will care until there is a cure!!!
The other really cool thing that I’m sure you loved watching was when Mr. Ronnie was in that bidding war over the puppy “Hope” and won her. He not only won but then gave Hope to Shaya…it was such an amazing act of love and kindness. Seeing Shaya’s smile did my heart so good. JT loves her too. Moe loves playing with Hope but we have to go slow because he is so big compared to her. Hope is a gold retriever and we are thinking of making her a therapy doggie to go to the hospital with us when we deliver JoyJars. Speaking of golden’s…how is Kobi and Bruin? Going to Heaven scared you but knowing you were going to care for Kobi & Bruin gave you something to hold on to. I bet you love them like you loved Moe. With all of you heart!!!
Jessie you have touched so many lives and will continue to. You touched mine 14 years ago and you forever have my heart. I still get made that I was not able to find a cure…it haunts me but I just have to trust. I wish I could say it’s easy but it’s not. Every parent wants nothing more than to help their kids achieve greatness. One lady told me at the gala she thought you were an Angel sent by God to raise awareness of this terrible disease. I won’t know for sure until I see you and talk to God. No matter what, you will always be an angel to me. I do believe God never gives you more than you can handle…so he must believe mommy, shaya, JT and I can handle life apart from you while we carry on your legacy of love. I wish it was not the case but again…we trust!
Jess I still pray that you are ok. Maybe it’s the daddy in me but I wonder…are you ok? Are you safe? Are you happy? I know in my head that you are but my heart still longs to protect my Sweet=Pea. I don’t think this will every change…it hurts but it also motivates me to help more and more kids. You forever changed my life Jess!!!
Miss you tons, love you more…see you in a “wink”
xoxo,
daddy