My Jessie Journal:: Hi Sweet Pea, it’s daddy! I love and miss you so much. This week my rollercoaster called “grief” took a dive and pretty much hasn’t leveled off. I have been in a funk for the last week and I know it will go away but it’s just the reality. It all started when we all got the news last Thursday night that our courageous fighter Christine joined you in Heaven. She had fought and beat cancer five times and was enjoying her first year of college here locally. I had the honor of first meeting Christine in 2014 and we had the honor of helping encourage her to NEGU in some special ways. She even recorded a song and made a music video…the song is called “It’s Only Temporary”.
Once we heard the news we reached out as a foundation to see how we could help her family….meals, prayers, anything. It was during this time I was asked to plan and officiate Christine’s Celebration of Life Service. I’m so humbled and honored….but it’s caused me to relive a lot. Mommy and I have sat with Christine’s parents and tried to offer come comfort as we have walked in their shoes before. Seeing videos of her last hours brought me right back to your last hours.
Her parents watched you Celebration of Life service and talked about a couple specific things they wanted in Christine’s. So this led me to a folder on my computer I had not opened for over six years. It sounds so weak of me but the hardest part for me was having to “click to open” your Celebration of Life word doc. I needed to use it for a framework for Christine but it took me three days to finally be ready to “click on it”. I just didn’t want to “go there” but I had to for Christine. Thankfully I finally did yesterday afternoon. The service isn’t until November 10th so I have time to ease into these waters that I avoided for so long.
As I started to craft Christine’s service, I realized you two were basically one month apart in age. You were born on April 8th and she was born on May 5th. She was 19 and you would have been 19. You grew up like 15 miles apart. You never met on earth. You both fought cancer. You both loved Jesus. You both are in Heaven now. Kind of crazy to think about.
As I was reading through your Celebration of Life it brought me back to your Facebook Page. I hadn’t logged in to that page for years. I did and saw so many encouraging comments from people sent years ago. I also saw pictures that I hadn’t seen for years. I hate cancer so much!!!
Jess, I know you have already met Christine so please give her big hugs from her family. They know she is in Heaven but they are just trying to learn to breathe again, which takes time. Have Christine sing her song to you, I know you will love it!
Love you so much Sweet Pea….see you in a wink! I Promise!!!