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Photo: My Jessie Journal:: Hi Sweet-Pea, it’s daddy. We are getting ready to leave on our annual summer vacation and it just does not feel right. I just want to hit the rewind button back to our last family vacation together in August of 2011 when we were all in Hawaii. I love this pic of you. Your smile is perfect and I miss it tons! </p><br /> <p>Our trip last year to NY was bitter sweet because it was our first family vacation as 4 instead of 5. What made it bearable was we were using your itinerary to plan each day. The one you had made when you came up with your list of favorite fashion & food stops. The “seconds” seem to hurt just as much as the firsts. Our second family vacation not at a family…such a weird dichotomy. You want to have so much and we do but it’s never going to be like the old vacations…we not vacation while our guts hurt so much that we want to throw up some days. </p><br /> <p>Of course we will press on and make the best out of it and wear our “happy masks” when needed. Shaya and JT deserve to have fun and fun we will have. I know it will be a ton of fun because Aunt Kimmy and Uncle T are joining us. They miss you so much too Jess. I think of all the special times you had with them while you were fighting cancer. They were always there for you, spent long weekends on the couch with you watching your fav shows and taking care of Mr. Moe when you were to weak to. What massive hearts they have. I’m sure we will talk about you, laugh and shed tears on vacation with them. Seems like that has become part of any family gather these days and it just feels right!!!</p><br /> <p>Jess, I wanted you to know we are moving the JoyFactory next month to Irvine. It’s only going to be 12 mins from the house but we had to find a bigger place so more and more volunteers can come and stuff JoyJars and make your NEGU PowerPacks. We are so blessed a local company had extra space in one of their buildings and is helping us out so we can all be in one space. It’s kind of bitter sweet because the JoyFactory will no longer be in your home town. Same county, but not same town. I know you understand and would be happy with it…change is just hard some days. We are hoping more families from Irvine get involved and help stuff joy along with getting schools in Irvine to hold JoyDrives at their schools. </p><br /> <p>Sweat-Pea…I miss you! Always will. It will always hurt when I think about you and not having you in our lives right now. I know where you are which helps a ton but it still hurts. I long to see you and touch your hair. I crave a hug and to hold your hand. I just want our family back as 5 and the crater in my heart to be gone. No matter how much my heart and soul hurt I will NEGU for you! My pain is nothing like the pain you had to endure so I have nothing to complain about. I will Never Ever Give Up encouraging, supporting and resourcing kids fighting cancer with a boost of joy, a message of hope and a team of love. Your simple wish of reaching all kids fighting cancer is the top priority of my life now. Everything I do...I do it for you!!!</p><br /> <p>I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!<br /><br /> daddy
My Jessie Journal:: Hi Sweet-Pea, it’s daddy. We are getting ready to leave on our annual summer vacation and it just does not feel right. I just want to hit the rewind button back to our last family vacation together in August of 2011 when we were all in Hawaii. I love this pic of you. Your smile is perfect and I miss it tons!Our trip last year to NY was bitter sweet because it was our first family vacation as 4 instead of 5. What made it bearable was we were using your itinerary to plan each day. The one you had made when you came up with your list of favorite fashion & food stops. The “seconds” seem to hurt just as much as the firsts. Our second family vacation not at a family…such a weird dichotomy. Youwant to have so much and we do but it’s never going to be like the old vacations…we not vacation while our guts hurt so much that we want to throw up some days.Of course we will press on and make the best out of it and wear our “happy masks” when needed. Shaya and JT deserve to have fun and fun we will have. I know it will be a ton of fun because Aunt Kimmy and Uncle T are joining us. They miss you so much too Jess. I think of all the special times you had with them while you were fighting cancer. They were always there for you, spent long weekends on the couch with you watching your fav shows and taking care of Mr. Moe when you were to weak to. What massive hearts they have. I’m sure we will talk about you, laugh and shed tears on vacation with them. Seems like that has become part of any family gather these days and it just feels right!!!

Jess, I wanted you to know we are moving the JoyFactory next month to Irvine. It’s only going to be 12 mins from the house but we had to find a bigger place so more and more volunteers can come

and stuff JoyJars and make your NEGU PowerPacks. We are so blessed a local company had extra space in one of their buildings and is helping us out so we can all be in one space. It’s kind of bitter sweet because the JoyFactory will no longer be in your home town. Same county, but not same town. I know you understand and would be happy with it…change is just hard some days. We are hoping more families from Irvine get involved and help stuff joy along with getting schools in Irvine to hold JoyDrives at their schools.Sweat-Pea…I miss you! Always will. It will always hurt when I think about you and not having you in our lives right now. I know where you are which helps a ton but it still hurts. I long to see you and touch your hair. I crave a hug and to hold your hand. I just want our family back as 5 and the crater in my heart to be gone. No matter how much my heart and soul hurt I will NEGU for you! My pain is

nothing like the pain you had to endure so I have nothing to complain about. I will Never Ever Give Up encouraging, supporting and resourcing kids fighting cancer with a boost of joy, a message of hope and a team of love. Your simple wish of reaching all kids fighting cancer is the top priority of my life now. Everything I do…I do it for you!!!I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!
daddy