My Jessie Journal:: Hi Sweet Pea, it’s daddy! I sure hope you are well. The last week has been challenging on many fronts but I promise you I will always NEGU for you=))). One of the challenges was hearing two different people tell me they question why I still write to you after 5 years. While I felt it was a massive kick in the gut, I just listened and told them I feel it’s good for my soul. Maybe I should stop posting but I will never stop writing to you every Thursday morning.
Later that night, I started hearing hammering in the house and I didn’t know what was happening. I discovered your amazing sister Shaya hanging a framed poem in her room by her bed. As I read it…my eyes filled with love and pain. Love for you and pain for Shaya.
The poem was written by F. Scott Fitzgerald and reads…”She was beautiful, but not like those girls in the magazines. She was beautiful, for the way she thought. She was beautiful, for the sparkle in her eyes when she talked about something she loved. She was beautiful, for her ability to make other people smile, even if she was sad. No, she wasn’t beautiful for something as temporary as her looks. She was beautiful, deep down to her soul. She is beautiful.”
The hardest word in the poem is “was”…it just reminds all of us the realities we live with.
Although I think you had great outer beauty like your mommy, this poem is such a picture of you, your heart and your inner beauty. I will forever remember the “sparkle” in your eyes!!!
I miss you so much!!!
xoxo,
daddy
