My Jessie Journal:: Hi Sweet Pea, it’s daddy! I love you and miss you so much. Do you know what March 16th is? It’s the day you made your first Facebook post back in 2011. I remember watching you type and ask people to pray for you. Now 6 years later, I’m writing and you are watching from Heaven.
6 years ago I was so scared, so worried and so full of pain. I was scared what cancer would do to you. I was worried I wouldn’t know how to help you and I was full of pain for mommy. We both did everything we could but mommy still thinks about how she could have done more. Any mommy would, her heart is so full of love for you and loss without you. It’s a pretty crazy way to live…you think about someone and you experience flashes of love…then you realize they are not her and pain rushes in due to the loss. I guess you can only really experience deep love if there was first deep love.
Having your foundation helps with the loss a little bit. It keeps our head out of depression and our gives us something positive to think about when there is pain. Seeing kids smile when they get your JoyJars is so fun. As we like to say, we don’t cure cancer…we cure bad days caused by cancer. I have ready so many stories of how your boosts of hope, joy and love always seems to arrive at the right time. That is such great news!
The other great piece of news is we are putting the final plans together for your 18th birthday extravaganza. Actually Shaya is=). She is planning an 18 hour marathon party where we are stuffing 1,800 of your JoyJars. We are going to have over 500 people coming to help stuff JoyJars. The party starts at 6am and ends at midnight. Yep…I’m going to stay up past 10pm=))). Shaya has companies donating food, she is planning on balloons/decorations and we trying to get Sprinkles to donate cupcakes. You loved cupcakes!!!! Look at this picture of you=))) Pure joy!
We couldn’t think of a better way to celebrate your 18th birthday than stuffing JoyJars with family, friends and the community. We all wish you were here to join us. I know, silly daddy! It would be an amazing gift…actually you have always been an amazing gift to me! I will always love bring your daddy!